Started by former Ms. Magazine intern Alexandra Tweten, the Instagram page is a place where women can call out rejected men who turn hostile by submitting screenshots of conversations. Convos like this:

Unfortunately, Stan is not alone. There is, however, a fortunate side to these women not being alone. Tweten shares her reasons for creating the account on the Ms. Blog: “My main reasons for creating the account were: A) Commiserating with other women (you can’t be a woman online and not get creepy messages from men); B) Letting men know what it’s like to be a woman online (it’s not all cupcakes and rainbows!); and C) To expose the problematic entitlement some men feel they need to exert over women in general.”

The account was opened mid-October and as of now has 150,543 followers and 47 posts.

You may have heard the comment that everyone is brave behind their computers, but as social media has become a primary form of social interactions this behaviour has to not only be called out, but to be stopped entirely. This is gender-based harassment.

Lane Florhseim writes of her online dating experience and using the elitist Sparkology. The site requires a man to have a degree from a list of approved college to sign up, and is described by its creator, Alex Furmansky, as a place where the guy with “the wine and flowers wins.”

Let’s pause there for a second: He wins. Women aren’t people, he seems to be saying, but trophies.

Since men need to pay $3 to send a woman a message, they feel more entitled to a response. Florhseim says the site encourages this sense of entitlement, as it sent her reminder messages saying, “Remember, he used one of his limited and pricey Sparks to send this special message specifically to you. We are sure he was nervous to hit the send button—so please be kind and check him out!”

As Florhseim says, the nice guy syndrome rules Sparkology. But this entitlement isn’t reserved for the elite guys with flowers and wine.

A Reddit user shares his story of pretending to be a girl, with the initial intent of proving online dating is easier for girls, “I thought it would be some fun thing, something where I would do it and worse case scenario say ‘lol I was a guy I trolled you lulz’ etc. but within a 2 hour span it got me really down and I was feeling really uncomfortable with everything.” He couldn’t handle this modern hetero-dating scene, as a female, for more than two hours.

Bye Felipe illustrates the “everyone is brave behind their computer” statement perfectly, as it does male entitlement. Some of these women haven’t had the chance to even read—never mind respond to—to these guys’ first messages before the exchange turns ugly. Hopefully, as these guys are called out, it will be obvious that this behaviour is not accepted, not just by women, but by society. In the meantime, the account can create a sense of solidarity, and a chance for these women to post their witty responses—which don’t have anything to do with the other person being fat, unlike most of these guys’ temper tantrums.

A former This intern, Hillary Di Menna is in her first year of the gender and women’s studies program at York University. She also maintains an online feminist resource directory, FIRE- Feminist Internet Resource Exchange.

This sense of entitlement is dangerous. It enforces the all-to-popular notion that a woman’s purpose is found solely in her body and how she lets others control it. Relationships based on this type of mind-set are doomed to fail, but also build a rocky foundation for future relationships, screwing up social circles everywhere.

“Girls gave their affection and sex and love to other men, but never to me … it’s not fair.” This is a sentiment heard in some gatherings of guys, whining about how even though they are so wonderful girls don’t like them because girls are stupid—a.k.a can’t force attraction to a dude just because he wants them to. We also see this sentiment echoed in countless Hollywood romcoms, and seen on many a “witty” meme. And another place, too: the video of “supreme gentlemen” Elliot Rodger, the MRA who killed six people in California this past weekend because, as he put it, girls are sluts for not having sex with him.

It may sound extreme to compare the average nice guy griping to a murderer and yet the message being sent is the same. Sociologist Michael Kimmel writes in his book, Angry White Men, “Men are angry and restless because of what they experience as the erosion of their ‘rightful’ privilege, and they have convenient targets for their rage … They’re angry at women, who, they argue, are beautiful, sexy, and sexually available—yet turn them down with contemptuous sneers.”

In other words, hetero males are being taught that as the superior sex, females owe them. And females are taught to be passive, accommodating people pleasers. Such a culture justifies the notion that if a guy is nice to a girl, and she doesn’t pay up, she is taking advantage of him. This way, the male is the victim and doesn’t need to admit to the fact that she isn’t attracted to him. The fact that women have a choice in whom they have sex with isn’t even considered. This cycle continues and sex turns into a right and not a pleasurable experience shared between consenting parties. This same entitlement mentality is often used to justify rape, as well, and it starts at elementary schools where stuff like “friend zone” is a real thing.

“The Friend Zone is a bullshit, misogynistic, make-believe land Nice Guys have come up with to demonize women for not wanting to date them,” writes Alisse Desrosiers in Feminspire. “They use it as an excuse to ignore the fact that there are actual reasons behind their decision to not pursue a relationship or have sex with this guy. You know, like not being physically attracted to them. Or not being able to connect with them. Or seeing through their crap and realizing that the only reason these guys are even friends with them in the first place is so they can get laid.”

Actual good people are the way they are for the sake of pure goodness, not to “get some.”